We often don’t place enough importance on the little things that people say, distracted by the other things in our lives – the TV, smart phone, laptop, tablet, iPad… There are so many virtual devices available to us, have we have stopped paying enough attention to the physical world around us? If so – why?
I feel very fortunate to have realised I needed to pay attention to what my Mom was saying to me but that was only over the last four years. When she had her first stoke and recovered her speech I realised how awful it would have been if I couldn’t ask her questions any more, or hear her stories, her opinions, her advice. I took time to soak this all up, knowing one day I wouldn’t be able to do this anymore. But I didn’t record it, well not all of it. So even now I worry that although I listened intently I may not be able to remember what she said. I did make some video recordings and I cherish those greatly. But Mom helped me because she did write things down and her words are even more reassuring. She just jotted things down, thoughts, moments, poems etc in a big green book and I feel I need to do the same.
So here is where I will remember, explore and record the “little things” that people have said or say and the little things that pop into my head whatever they might be. I am not going for profound, deep or weighty just the things we sometimes throw out there without much thought or never actually share and only think. Small nuggets of humour or wisdom that can go unnoticed in our busy lives collected and shared.
Mom and I had some words or sayings that we used often, I’m not sure they were original, but they have stuck with me. Here is my first one “dofor” a dofor is the noun from the saying “do for nows last forever”. This is the belief that when we do something “for now”, just quickly to fix it short term, like sticky taping something back together, 10 years later you realise that you never did go back and fix it better and the sticky tape is still doing its job. The “do for now” or “dofor” lasted forever (well 10 years at least).
I have heard and read a lot over recent years about “active listening” and often although people have said they are listening, that they “hear what I am saying” it isn’t active unless we do something with what we hear. And so the action comes after the listening, it is what will we do with what we heard that’s important. Remembering what was said, sharing it with others, writing it down, applying it to life, repeating it back to the person who said it to enrich it further (while you have the chance).
Well I suppose that’s it for today and I do feel better, just the act of typing this has brought some calm to my mind. What is around the corner? Round the bend in the road? We can’t know but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t carry on down the path, it just might be a good idea to make some notes on the journey to make sure we don’t get lost along the way.
The Bend in the Road 